Hold Your Own

With an adventurous life the hot asphalt can lead you to places of familiarity, yet often your feet tread along untamed ground; drenching your spiritual soul in a baptism of nature.  ~ TL Alton 

 "Walk Away" by Xavier Rudd

"I've seen people holding on to nothing
Broken dreams and broken cords
Running on empty, losing sleep, oh
It's true I've earned these cracks upon my feet  
Walk away from all that you know
Walk away and hold your own 
And I've seen people holding on to something
Smiling with no place to call home
In you I see something so familiar, uh
My dear friend, so nice to have you home..."

* My summer song...Video Link: https://youtu.be/7GQvdgT6Eh0

My absence in posting on my blog is for good reason. I have been employed by Sandstorm North Contracting, as a Park Operator for BC Provincial Parks. As I contemplate this phenomenal opportunity that has been offered to me, this past month has seen me deep in training and ‘the field’ work. I now breathe in the air of the northern region, while the vast landscape of the outdoors is my office. 

Travelling to my destination started out with great intentions, yet as the time drew nearer to depart, everything that could unravel – did. My dear friend TJ was put to task in ways that pushes beyond the boundaries of a solid friendship. When booking my Greyhound ticket from Vernon, BC to Prince George, we discovered the seats were sold out on the day I was to travel. We were fortunate to purchase a ticket on the last route available. In doing so, everything that was to be done in 48 hours now had to be accomplished within 12 hours! This escalated us into a frenzy of preparedness; much of which felt like we were involved in an emergency drill. Looking at the list of things I would need, we dashed out to Walmart to buy steel toed boots and a bed in a bag, amongst other necessities.

Later, while I tried to book on-line a place to stay for one night in Prince George, TJ washed my clothes in her mini washer/spinner. At one point, I heard the noise of a hair dryer going on for awhile. When I popped my head into her room, there was my friend, hand drying my clothes with utmost care. I was humbled by all TJ invested in my new employment, while at the same time I had to let a laugh escape of the scene before me.

 As my frustration grew with trying to find a hotel that was not charging $300 for deposit, I wished back then I had more experience with the Verbal Judo I have come to acquire through my training/ employment. In the end, I found a marvellous B & B in Prince George called: “The Grateful Bed.” Both Ted and Joyce were accommodating, providing a lovely home of tranquility and a hearty breakfast that complimented the discussions we shared.   

At this point, while still at TJ’s, I was assuming in the morning I would be on a Greyhound to PG. The next day, upon arriving at the bus depot with paid ticket in hand, TJ and I were put in a moment of shock upon hearing there was a flash flood in Cache Creek and the road was washed out. Without any hesitation, TJ looked at me and with that smile of hers that exudes adventure, she said: “Road trip!” The brilliance of this was, her husband Dean, had spent a lot of time converting a recently bought van and we were about to put it to the test!

Falling short of a miracle, we were bound to the Great White North…minus the chilled beers and toques! 

Taking turns to drive, we chatted and shared stories. At one point, we became giddy- at anything- while filling the van with raucous laughter! The time we spent together was incomparable to a 10 ½ hour bus ride. It was exactly what I needed…a send off of sorts.  Recently, I saw in a local Thrift Store the film: Planes, Trains and Automobiles. This prompted me to burst into laughter, as it summoned up our trip of bedlam!

A day later, I drove to Charlie Lake to stay there as we began training in Fort St. John. At one point, I had to go outside to take a moment to appreciate my surroundings. Reflecting on a year ago and where I was made me realize how I had the strength to say: 

It is well with my soul, to accomplish all I have in 365 days!  

 

It is a testimony to my faith, as I reap the rewards of all that I have been blessed with so far. While I am well versed in the service aspect of assisting campers, the physical portion of what I do on my 10 days of work constantly amazes me! I attribute my weight loss to the vigorous routine of outdoor tasks including campsite clean-up. Last week, I pulled branches out of the woods, then carrying chain-sawed rounds of cedar, pine and birch, lifted them into our work truck and finally hauled the wood onto the piles into our compound. 

My neatly stacked piles- lol

 I was feeling confident at my skills, until I witnessed my much smaller framed workmate lift, move and accomplish things of such an incredible feat that I have kindly referred to her as mini-Thor. 

While my morning shifts begin early, I take this time to give thanks to the surroundings I am in. As various birds alight my daybreak with their melodies, I take in a mouthful of air and exhale words of being grateful. On my four days off,  I have spent time gliding across Moberly Lake, while my kayak paddle caresses the mirrored image of spruce trees and wispy currents, I embrace all that I have been graced with. 

Moberly Lake

On Mother’s Day when I was missing my babygirl, I was not alone. The forests encircling me, teeming with life, were of comfort. As I worked on my own, a vibrant orange butterfly followed me from each campsite I cleaned and prepared. Before the day ended I discovered a small set of plastic keys, tucked into the dirt, by a picnic table. I recalled the unique key to my book, “Under the Sitka Tree.”

For now, my novel has been resting- on pause- as I build more layers onto me through the experiences I am living. 

Later, I received a beautiful gift of a card and a rainbow butterfly that hangs in my room, a gentle reminder that Shayla is always near in my heart. I think of how proud she would be of me…closing my eyes I can see her big, stunning smile, nodding her head and saying: “Way to be Momma!” 

I have been fortunate to have found a place to write new posts on my blog. A welcoming place is at Chetwynd Public Library. All the staff have been gracious, in the bags I bring in from my shopping, to stock up for the next ten days. 

It was shared with me that one of the ladies (Pam), operating the cafe next door is the mother to NHL defenseman Deryk Engelland, of the Vegas Golden Knights. She is currently supporting her son during the Stanley Cup Playoffs in Las Vegas. Posters featuring Engelland, can be seen at the local library. 

 

A big event in Chetwynd is the International Chainsaw Carving Championship. All throughout the area are phenomenal images all carved out of wood, with a chainsaw.  There are many favourites of mine, for that reason I encourage others to check out on Facebook.

 
With the first month of employment complete, I am eager to see what will unfold, including encountering more wildlife.  One night while doing my routine drive through the campsite at Moberly Provincial Park, a Barred Owl flew in front of the truck. I was mesmerized by its presence; knowing full well it would become part of my story. 

All the exploring I have done has awakened a side of me that pushes harder. From the numerous vehicles I have driven, to the power tools I have been introduced too, there is only room for learning more!  I have had to stop comparing myself to others and their capabilities, as I am shaping my own self into who I am suppose to be- holding my own.  

Dear Determined Soul,
This is YOUR LIFE, and that means that you are responsible for your decisions, right? You are the one who has to live with them, work with them, and build a future with them. Friend, the ONLY way to get to the truth is to listen to your heart, to pay very close attention to your gut. When something is right and true, we feel peaceful.
Things that are right and true are not always the answers that we are hoping for, and they are not always the easiest answers. But they always bring us to a place of peace.
Be brave enough to choose the path that is best for YOU no matter what those outside opinions are. You will know what is right for you.

You can do it. You are so loved.
xoxo ~ Brave Living 

By TL Alton